L Rizzy's Adventures: More Birthday Presents for L Rizzy's First

Blograders:

Unless you completely hate us or take no interest in our lives, certainly you are aware that the anniversary of our child's parturition awaits us on the morrow. However, to be completely obtuse, if you did harbor said hate or paucity of interest in our lives, then your visiting of this site and viewing it's contents therein is quite contradictory. Please evaluate your intentions and sincerity prior to reading the following post taking particular note as to the motivations for your loitering. If you find your answer to this simple inquiry is anything but pure, please, close the internet browser, rub your eyes, take a sip of that disgusting cup of 2 hour old coffee on your desk, and for the love of Pete, get back to work slacker.

A year ago this day, L Mama was frustrated with the relative tardiness of our aforementioned child. So much so, in fact, that in an effort to scare him (we all knew it was a boy, right? You saw the ultrasound... either a boy or someone punishing me for past transgressions with the ugliest girl ever made) out of her belly, she made the trek to In-N-Out Burger and absolutely shoveled an Animal Style burger into her pie hole in under 3 minutes flat. Like a wolf satisfied with her feast, she returned to the apartment to await my return from the hospital. The only issue was, I was swamped with cases and would not in fact be coming home until 1 am on March 18 (alas, at that time I still happened to be gainfully employed in the arena of heart surgeon). When I returned, after having a salad, 3 mile run, and a large glass of beetroot juice, I crashed into the world's best bed: king sized Tempurpedic covered in Rottweiler hair and reeking of Rottweiler musk. Nary an hour later, I was awoken to the gentle abuse from a wife who claimed she was possibly having contractions. Impossible, I said, contractions never start at night. I pointed to my medical school diploma and drifted back to sleep.

Perhaps a bit of embellishment... actually downright made up. But in actuality I told her I needed a minute or two of sleep prior to returning to the hospital. Several hours later when the clock struck 6 am we made our way into the maternity ward at Cedars and over the next 11 hours we proceeded to welcome into our world the apple of our eye. With a bit of help from the impeccable timing from Aunt T, L Rizzy joined us making our trio into a quadriceps.

Tomorrow that little bundle of eat/sleep/poop/repeat turns 1. We will quietly celebrate as a family and a party will be held at our flat next Sunday complete with cupcakes, pizza, Aunt T, and our Leipzig friends including Jimmy Beam. In addition to the package from the Milosevic's previously blogged about, The Rizzy has already received many more gifts than he may or may not deserve including a deposit into our American Storage-unit Paying checking account from Grandmother Molly, a nice card and cash from Na Na, and a surprise package delivered by man who emphasized the "ass" in Lucas way too much. This package was a gorgeous outfit that L Rizzy is sure to regrettably destroy as the weather gets warmer from Aunt Jenny, Uncle Frank and cousins Charles and Elyse. The Riz couldn't contain his excitement over the extensive packaging and wonderful velvety ribbons to play with.

All in all, we are terribly excited for his first birthday. While we are overseas and cannot share it with most of our friends and family in the states, please know that L Rizzy sends love from Germany and he wishes to say this to all of you: "Da do ba ba ba ba bi ba ba."